Macarons.

When I was in Paris, I ate macarons. Alot of them. Cheerfully with wild abandon because that is what you do when you are in Paris!  Prior to going Paris, I had tried macarons at Europane Cafe + Bakery in Pasadena ( a block from where I work, it is one of my favorite lunch destinations and they are dedicated to fixing a sweet tooth).

Now I enjoy baking and macarons have been on my list to try, but they fall under the "scary" category. I've got a few books dedicated to the macaron as well but all I have done is tag flavor profiles that I love or would like to try at some point. (I learned that the recipes in I Love Macarons from Japan are crap, so if anything, it's a lovely coffee table book).  Les Petits Macarons is a lovely book on the subject matter too. Of course, the book that I am lusting after for is Pierre Herme's book on the subject, Macarons.

So like any smart girl who fears a recipe, I signed up for the Intro to Macarons class at The Gourmandise School of Sweets & Savories in Santa Monica, taught by Clemence Gossett (one of the school's owners). All 15 of us students were a bit wound up, Clemence could smell the fear on us and she instantly put all of us at ease.  With her laid back nature and encouraging teaching style, she was able to assuage our fears and voila - we made vanilla macarons with buttercream ( we flavored them with raspberry, citrus and vanilla) and/or chocolate ganache. Practice will make perfect...one day.

Blog Challenge No. 2: Courage.

For the next round of Dian Reid's Authenticity Blog Challenge, I chose the topic of courage. For me, this one is definitely personal and while I'm going to attempt to correlate my love of food with the various topics, this one is on a whole other level.

Courage takes shape in one of the greatest unknowns - moving across country for love. In the fall of 2005, I fell in love. Smack dab across the concrete of love, I fell hard. I pursued a long distance relationship with a fellow in the Midwest and subsequently, one year later, I made the ultimate transition and relocated to be with him. Now that takes courage - guts and a lil' glory too. To step out of my confort zones, uproot my life and plant a new one in totally unchartered territory.

And while moving across country for love takes courage, there's an even greater of level of courage that birthed in me. That form of courage played out in the decision to end the relationship and move back home to California. It was tumultuous, grueling, and even when I stepped back onto California soil, I still wrestled with my decision. Did I make the right decision? Could we have made it work? Would I be happy? Would I be true to my heart's desires?

Today marks 10 months since I left the Midwest and while there is still a bittersweet sorrow that looms, I can honestly say it was the most courageous decision I've made to date. By far, I'm not perfect and I wouldn't admit to having it all together, let alone being completely healed and whole from the closure of that relationship, but I chose courage over hardship. Courage over complacency. The courage to accept who I am and what I am not cut out for. The courage to love and let go. The courage to be me wholeheartedly. I think what ultimately steered me in the right decision, was the fear of not exercising that courage. The fear of not being true to myself.

How has courage played a part in your past or your present? Or how has not exercising courage kept you from your true self?

** photo taken on my road trip heading back to LA, August 2009. This one was taken in Utah at a scenic stop.